I'm a social networker. My entire life is online and has been since I was 19 - what feels like since the beginning of time. Twitter & Facebook, my website, DailyMile, Gmail, GoogleTalk... everything. I am online all day every day. I enjoy a day off here and there to refocus but generally I am either on my phone or on my MacBook Pro getting work done or socializing. I've had my business since I was 20. I've watched it evolve and grow into a very social place. I love that social place.

First, I was on MySpace, then Friendster, then Facebook came out to more than just a few elite colleges & I jumped on. Facebook has helped me keep in touch with people who I lived near on both coasts, people who picked on me in high school, and people who I've wanted to cultivate close friendships with, along with all of my friends and colleagues that I wish happy birthday to once a year.

Today, I quit Facebook.

Everyone thinks about doing it from time to time but then they remember that their grandma keeps track of them that way and can't pull the trigger. I have thought about it many times but never could do it. I wanted to but felt compelled to keep in touch with the over 500 people I was 'friends' with. Until I went to TEDxMidAtlantic.

One of the speakers, Rebecca Renard, is a librarian in DC and gave a talk on teens and their need to give love. She started talking about how she would post an update on Facebook and instead of waiting until the next day to see if anyone liked it, she'd jump on 2 minutes later in hopes of positive feedback. While everyone laughed, I realized that I am the same way. I don't even realize it. After tweeting that, one of my fellow attendees tweeted that he quit Facebook 3 years ago and has never looked back. This stopped me in my tracks.

Backing up a little, Sisarina has implemented an almost weekly No Talking Tuesday policy. We shut down all forms of communication except email and get a LOT of work done. We all look forward to this day. I didn't realize how often I open my Safari to find my preloaded Facebook wall to see what people said about my post and then get sucked into everyone's pictures and updates until we started No Talking Tuesday. I know I have to be social during the work day but I realized that I spend a LOT of time getting sucked into it. I click that Safari window that holds Facebook and my personal Gmail about 100x a day. How? Because I have social ADD.

Being an entrepreneur, I don't have a lot of time to waste. Another TEDxMidAtlantic talk gave a lot of insight into how much time we have and how much we have to budget in that time. He explained how each of us has a suitcase that equals our budget. This can be money or time. If we have a small suitcase, we have to remove things from it so we can fit in other things. Since we already have only the things required, we have to make sure the sacrifice is a good one to replace it. If we have a large suitcase, we just throw stuff in it & leave some room for other things but we don't think about that.

Facebook is what I removed. I have a very small suitcase of time. I have a LOT of things crammed into a very small amount of time. Between running a very busy business and a very busy life, Facebook is not something that're required. I have incredible friends that I chat with on IM or text or even the ancient email everyone thinks is disappearing. My friends will always remain my friends, my colleagues will continue to be great colleagues. I'll see my friends as normal but I'll say "so, what's going on in life?" and really not know the answer.

I'm not saying here that everyone should jump the Facebook ship. I'm also not saying I want you to come to my website all the time and find out what's up in my life. All I'm saying is that I am too easily absorbed by Facebook and hope that you'll text me to say hi instead.

Happy Facebooking!

*photo credit: Teresa Thomas (thanks for documenting my last moment on Facebook)

"Why don't I have ____?"      

                                                                  "Why can't I get ____?"
            "I'd be so much happier if ____?"

Ever catch yourself asking these questions of yourself? I finally quit... and guess who is happier than ever before? Me.

So many people think that if they had more, they would be better off. The grass is always greener. If you are single, you wonder what it's like to be married. If you're married, you wonder why you made that decision. If you don't have kids, you yearn for them. If you do have kids, you're happy to give them up for a night off. If you're in an unhappy job, you know you'd be happier working for yourself. If you work for yourself, you wish for the days of a steady paycheck. Greener... but is it?

At the beginning of this year, I set a goal of intentionality. I didn't do a New Year's resolution. No "I'll eat less and run more". No "I'll walk the dogs more." No "I'll take more time off." Just a goal of being intentional with everything I do because no one else was going to live my life better than me. 7.5 months later, I see the fruits of my intentional intentionality... and every day it's clearer.

No more worrying. When I set this goal, it was to put full faith that God had given me the tools and the strength to be a success. I finally started leaning on Him and with that I had to stop worrying about everything. Money, relationships, work, family, everyday details... Once I stopped, I was able to focus on what He really wanted for me - my best life. A life that was in place to help others accomplish and live their own.

I love my life. My friends, my family, my job, my coworkers, my clients, my dogs, my home, my office, my body, my goals, my everything. Nothing is perfect but man, I really love where I am a month from 31. I am happy, I am healthy, I'm in the best shape of my life, I'm a successful entrepreneur, I travel, I am full of faith... it's all coming together.

Being intentional about who is in my life, what I do with my days, and how I find peaceful rest each night knowing I'm living my best life is how I am able to just be happy.

Are you happy? How are you intentional about your life?

It's been a week & I'm still alive.

I've written before about my body image. I've told you all how much I hate my body… I still do and not because I'm trying to get any of you to say otherwise. It's my issue, not yours. I know I'm thin, I just hate my curves and bumps and love handles. My middle has been a source of disdain for the last 7 years and I've done everything in my power to make it go away… or so I thought.

A week ago I realized that two things were happening. 1. My middle area was not getting smaller no matter how much I worked out. 2. My intestines hated me almost every day. 

Why did I pick these?

I'd talked about doing a detox but couldn't figure out how to do it so I just kept putting it off. Knowing that I'm probably allergic to some of the foods I'm eating I decided to give up the 2 things most people have problems with: wheat & dairy. I also noticed that my sleeping patterns were all messed up and it was a crazy cycle of drinking caffeine every day then not sleeping because I'm naturally caffeinated as it is. Then because I didn't sleep, I'd need caffeine. Processed sugar & fried foods are just bad. End of that story. Alcohol became an issue when I realized that I was working way too much & felt the need to drink on my couch at home while I was working to make it not feel so stressful. I was drinking 4+ days a week and that also didn't help with my sleep habits and caused me not to want to go running. Now do you see?

First Week Report:

Aside from accidentally ordering ginger ale last night out of habit while out for a friend's birthday instead of my usual rum & ginger ale, I've stuck to the plan since last Sunday morning. 7 straight days.

• Wheat: easy-peasy. I don't eat a lot of wheat as it is. I don't plan on adding much back into my diet after this is over.
• Dairy:  isn't too bad since I'm not eating cereal or drinking coffee. I believe I'll be eating the giant container of Greek yogurt in my fridge this week though since it's too expensive to waste. 
• Sugar: The hardest of all of the list. I want a cookie or something sweet after lunch/dinner and have SUCH a hard time breaking this habit. I didn't realize how bad it was until I gave it up and didn't give in. I'm a sugar-lush! Fruits have helped replace this but nothing is as delicious as a fresh baked chocolate chip cookie… !! 
• Fried food: I do crave a big bowl of french fries but I have sweet potatoes that I may bake instead. I'm removing this from my diet wholly. No more fried foods ever.
• Caffeine: The first few days were really tough. I went to work exhausted. Later in the week I realized I was sleeping better, feeling more alert longer and ended the week wide awake. This is something I'll be giving up for good.
• Alcohol: This has been tough. I spent the entire first 6 days with just water. Nothing else. Yesterday I made a mocktail of 100% blueberry & pomegranate juice with seltzer water to help me through the craving.

Having friends support me and go through this with has been an amazing experience. It's been really rough but my whole being feels better and it's prompted me to hit my workout regimen much harder than normal. I'm heading into my 30's (31 shortly!) and want to make sure I hit them with a rock solid, hardcore body. Inside AND out.

Keep track of all of us & what we're eating at melaniespring.com/4-week-detox or #4weekdetox

Happy & healthy eating! 
Melanie

Received from a friend regarding the announcement that May 1, 2011 was Sisarina's 2nd birthday:

so i wanted to send a note of congratulations on Sisarina's 2 year anniversary.

as i watched a dos equis commercial i realized that you, melanie spring, could possibly qualify as the most interesting woman in the world...so i checked the internet to see how you stacked up to the bearded, mexican beer drinker and here is what i found:

“He is the life of parties he has never attended” - you, being a social media master, don't even need to be somewhere to be the life of that particular party.

“Sharks have a week dedicated to him” - Small cuddly dogs have weeks dedicated to you...hmmm...you may need to do some work in this area.

"If he were to mail a letter without postage, it would still get there". - again, you being a master of all forms of electronic communication, never use postage either.

"He once punched a magician. That’s right, you heard me." - yeah. something tells me that you and capt. morgan have had some choice evenings...

"He lives vicariously through himself." - i believe this is the "living intentionally" that you were talking about.

“He planted the idea for the movie ‘Inception’ into Christopher Nolan’s mind while he was dreaming.” - you may have just tweeted it first

So it looks like you're well on your way - congrats on sticking to your vision these last two years, congrats on building a company that has principles (and principals), and thank you for being an example to the rest of us. stay thirsty, my friend!

- David, @dsklarin

I've recently discovered just how human I am.

This past week I helped organize a group we ended up calling #MetroCarols. Our intentions were pure, our excitement for the holiday was intense and we love to sing. Cheering up the curmudgeons of the DC area on their miserable commute home was our plan & singing Christmas/holiday carols was what we thought would be best. Plan: Organize a flashmob that just happened to break out in carols randomly in metro stations.

Once word went out, my cohort & I realized that we had a much bigger sphere of influence, especially together, than we had any idea. The press & bloggers caught on and we had 150 people sign up. Things got out of control, he did an interview with the Examiner & once the press started posting articles about our plans, metro riders commented with a vengeance. After hearing about stun-guns, their wanting to punch us or push us off platforms, we took our plans off the public Facebook invitation so that we didn't end up doing what they accused us of: ruining their commute. 

By Monday, we had done some behind-the-scenes practicing with the trustworthy NPR & WUSA around to listen in & passed around our plan for where we were going that evening. At 11:30am, TBD & WashFM posted our PRIVATE schedule on their websites for all to see. Tears flooded my eyes and I realized that things had gotten out of hand. Although I was publicly accused of being ridiculous, I was honestly only afraid that if anyone was hurt due to the angry Metro riders showing up just to spite us, I would be left responsible for the tragedy. My humanity hit hard.

I called my cohort with overwhelming amounts of worry and told him I wanted to go home and cry myself to sleep. He had no intentions of backing down and satiated my worry by telling me that I needed to just come enjoy it in the spirit that we had planned in the first place - to spread cheer to commuters.

In a final change of plans so as not to allow anyone to get hurt, we moved to Dupont Circle, press surrounding us, as a group of 30 carolers, and sang joyfully with smiles & chills. The cold air caused us to sing Let It Snow & snowflakes started falling in a beautiful coincidence. Our joy was passed on to those leaving work that chilly Monday evening & DC commuters smiled at us as we moved closer to the Dupont escalator to sing a few more songs without impeding their rush home.

My smile got brighter the more we sang, our group gained momentum and carolers and we ended up singing the 12 Days of DC up and down the escalator & other carols into the Dupont station. After boarding a train & heading to Union Station, we started singing again & stood in a group caroling while people walked past with smiles & joy clearly showing on their faces.

Final outcome: Although my humanity almost got the best of me, we accomplished our main intentions - spread holiday cheer & make people smile - except with full press coverage.

PRESS & VIDEOS:

Check out what they wrote & said about us along with hearing us sing:

GREAT piece by NPR's Nate Rott

WUSA (Channel 9, CBS) coverage with videos of our rehearsal and of the event

Washington Post edited video:



Washington Post video on YouTube:


Washington Post article

Washington Post "Dr. Gridlock" blog about Metro

WeLoveDC's article

Waxing Unlyrical's article by Shonali Burke

A local radio announcer had a 'positive tip of the day' a few weeks ago:  "Your private life says more about you than your public life." It really got me thinking about the things in my life that are private, things I would hate for others to find out about.

One of my dear friends, Rashmee, passed away suddenly recently. She was here, then she wasn't. Gone without warning. Her little light left this world and a mark on all of us left behind. She was such a darling young woman who gave so much to the people around her. Her life was marked by having so many people who loved her. When she died, I started thinking about everything she left behind unfinished or hidden. Did she have things she hoped no one would find? It wasn't her time to go. Did she have relationships, emails, pictures, things that she didn't expect anyone to ever see? I doubt it. She lived in a clean life with clean friends and a loving family. She had nothing to complete, just a lot of living to do.

My life has come under serious scrutiny by myself. Looking at every aspect of who I am, what I am, where I am, what I have, everything - has really made me stop and think about where I am going. If I died today, would people find things they didn't know about me? What would they think of me? Would their perception of me change?

God asks us as Christians to live our lives in accordance to His gospel - to walk as Christians in all aspects of our lives. Rules for Practical Christian Living is found in Ephesians 5.

Be careful how you walk, not as unwise men but as wise, making the most of your time, because the days are evil. So then do not be foolish, but understand what the will of the Lord is.

And do not get drunk with wine, for that is dissipation, but be filled with the Spirit, speaking to one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody with your heart to the Lord; always giving thanks for all things in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to God, even the Father; and be subject to one another in the fear of Christ. - Ephesians 5:15-21

Being a Christian and walking in His light, without losing our inhibitions or who we are as true Christians, is all He asks. 'Do not get drunk with wine' is not just warning against drunkenness, it's telling us that when we get drunk we lose our discernment and act in ways we wouldn't if we weren't drunk. Excessive anything is not living the way He has asked us.

Walking on a straight and narrow path allows us to face the right direction, continuing along in the way we are supposed to and in every aspect of our lives. It doesn't just ask us to be public figures as Christians, but also in our private lives. Recently I've been hearing a Christian artist say that it's easy for us to confess our sins to God but it's not easy to tell others of our indiscretions. We should tell those around us about what we've done so we can have more desire to change our sinful ways.

Think about the skeletons in your closet, the things you want to get off your chest, the things you have hidden in drawers or boxes so no one finds them... all the things someone might find out if you died suddenly. Are you prepared to leave behind the memories of who you are and what you have? Think about it and start cleaning out your life. I'm cleaning mine out. As much as I am a Christian that doesn't mean I have nothing to hide. Why would I want people to know about the sinful person I am?

Thank you, my dear little Rashmee, for making things more clear in my life. Thank you, my heavenly Father, for listening to my sins and forgiving me for them. Thank you, my friends, for listening and supporting me through all of life's changes and decisions. Now it's time to make it happen.

I am constantly surprised at the vastness of God’s love for me.

About 18 months ago I decided I wanted a solid group of Christian women in my life so I started a monthly women’s bible study at my church. The group now has 30 people with at least 10 people in attendance every month. This month has been especially hard for a lot of us and our study was about encouraging ourselves in the Lord based on Psalm 6. David had many tough times where he felt God had left him only to find He was right there the whole time.

One year ago on May 1 I started working for myself full-time again. I had a laptop, my old job’s promise of referrals and my God-given talents at networking. God has provided so much over the last 12 months – an office, many incredible clients, steadfast friendships, mentors, employees, and so much more. There have been valleys and mountains and I feel like I’ve accomplished so much for having started with nothing. But right now I feel like the biggest failure.

There are so many doubts, so many fears… and the knots in my stomach just keep growing. I don’t know what to do about all of it. The doubt ebbs and flows as does the worry. It’s hard to talk to anyone about it because I feel like I’m falling apart but then I say something to another entrepreneur and they give me that knowing look. Every one of them has been through exactly what I’m going through. “Been there, done that, still wear the t-shirt.”

Entrepreneur for life – that’s me. I will never work for a boss again but I’ve realized that the boss I do have is the most powerful, most successful, most driven boss anyone could have. He holds me when I feel like the world has left me standing in the storm alone. I doubt God is taking care of me but He’s got bigger plans than I can even think of.

At the bible study on Monday I let it all out – all the fears, the tears and the worry. The reception I received and love I felt was astounding. I felt they took my worry and cast it to the sky so God could dissipate it for me. The next morning I walked out my door to find a plate of homemade brownies with a poncho that said ‘so you can dance in the rain’ – the dear girl who has a life full of worry was able to give me a sense of hope and love. This group I started so many months ago has given me back way more than I could ever give them.

The song ‘Your Hands’ by JJ Heller keeps playing on my radio – the words flow through me like God is pouring Himself into me. At the study someone said ‘we have to pour ourselves out so God can pour Himself in.’

“When my world is shaking heaven stands.” This is a daily reminder of God’s love.

--

Your Hands – JJ Heller

I have unanswered prayers
I have trouble I wish wasn't there
And I have asked a thousand ways
That You would take my pain away

I am trying to understand
How to walk this weary land
Make straight the paths that crookedly lie
Oh Lord, before these feet of mine

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands

When You walked upon the Earth
You healed the broken, lost, and hurt
I know You hate to see me cry
One day You will set all things right

When my world is shaking
Heaven stands
When my heart is breaking
I never leave Your hands

Your hands
Your hands that shape the world
Are holding me, they hold me still